Although it makes me groan when someone asks if I’m feeling “Maxed-out” as I approach my due date, I have to appreciate their courage to make such corny jokes (Ryan, your boldness in this area is always enjoyed). Just like the old man at the gym who repeatedly says, “Looks like your ab routine isn’t working!” Normally I would give a painful courtesy smile, but he’s cute and very old so I indulge him a little more. But the truth is I still can’t believe I’m four weeks away from delivering my baby boy. This pregnancy has been so much easier in some ways, more uncomfortable in others, but the truth is I will always be a fan of pregnancy and I really do love the belly. And seeing as Tim and I are not quite sure if more than two children are in our future, I’m really trying to soak up as much of this time as I can and enjoy every moment. Even if it’s been three nights in a row that I haven’t slept more than four hours and he kicks my cervix so hard I’m waiting for a foot to come shooting out of my vajayjay.

Sunday night my amazing girlfriends surprised me with a baby shower and loved on me with gifts and quality time together. This pregnancy has gone by so quickly and I often find myself having a hard time getting in the mindset that this is really happening. But opening all the gifts, seeing the itty-bitty clothes and reading the encouraging cards sent me home excited and really kicked-started me in the direction of emotionally preparing for Max. And it also made me realize not only how much I am loved, but how much my children are loved as well and that touches my heart so deeply.

Not that I didn’t appreciate all the baby-love, but I have to share the hand-made gifts because as you know, that’s totally my thing. Amanda made the sweetest little pillow for Max to match his bedding, and I was secretly hoping she would make one since I saw one she made for another one of our friends and she didn’t disappoint.

Jen recently acquired a serger and has been sewing things like crazy and made some burp clothes and washrags. They’re super soft and even have a tag in case Max follows in his big brother’s footsteps of being extremely tactile and wanting to rub them.

Gaylyn made the cutest stamped onesies (I know I know, the tutorial is coming I promise - please don’t throw trash at me), and the favorite of the night was “Small Grahl” (for those of you who don’t know that is my last name, pronounced Grawl. It just rolls off the tongue, doesn’t it?). She also made an adorable little brag book for me to whip out and annoy endless people with when they ask how many children I have. It was such a great night and I feel so blessed to be surrounded by such wonderful, supportive and generous women. I love you guys!

Another jolt into the reality of Max’s impending birth: Our labor refresher course. Having Conner without meds was one of the BEST experiences of my life, I would never go back and change it, all of it was totally worth it (pinky swear), but this time around the thought makes me break into a cold sweat. I thought for sure after taking the refresher course that I would be psyched to do it again au natural, but that is not the case. I have no doubt that I can do it - obviously I can. Even at the worst time of labor I never once regretted not taking the epi, but this time around I just don’t know if I want to. It was exhausting. And long. And, yes, hurt like the dickens. When some of my girlfriends had their firsts (and second), they talked about how peaceful it was since they opted for the meds. Conner’s birth - not so peaceful. But any mom who has chosen to do it naturally can tell you how amazing it is once they are born. All those natural hormones rushing and your so into it because of everything you’ve just felt and gone through, and not to get all women’s lib, but it really is empowering. So I have no idea what I’m gonna do. Not really asking for advice on this one - I know I’ll make the right decision for me and Max (and Tim since he’s the one who will have to walk the five miles around the hospital during labor like I did the first time), just trying to sort through my thoughts and feelings about it.

Okay, lots more stuff going on but to keep you from being bored to tears I shall stop here. Here’s a picture of my baby as he wakes from his fourth night sleeping in his big boy bed (and it’s going so well - woot woot!). Ugh - it kills me how fast he is growing up.

I knew that having a toddler would mean I would get to use a lot of band-aids and kiss a lot of booboo’s, but sometimes you have to deal with a little more than superficial wounds. Conner has recently given me a few scares that have caused a few wrinkles to pop out, but also a thankful heart to be opened up.

A few weeks back we were eating lunch with a friend, and he began to choke on a pretzel. I remember from my CPR class (that I took many, many moons ago) that as long as they are coughing, it meant air was getting in and out and you shouldn’t smack them on the back or help them physically. But Conner began to get panicked as he couldn’t catch his breath and then in an instant he went from red-faced to completely purple and not able to breathe. Have you ever seen your child full-out choking? Did it scare the crap out of you? It should. It was terrifying. I jumped out of my chair and began the heimlich, which on the second attempt caused his food to dislodge and he vomitted on the table. As he sobbed into my chest for a good bit it didn’t hit me until later what had happened, and then as my baby took a nap in his crib, I sat and sobbed outside his bedroom door.

Today while at a friends house, we were sitting in the kitchen and Conner fell against a door and popped it open (that I thought was just the pantry) and began to fall backwards down the basement steps. It took a minute for me to realize what was going on, but as I kept hearing the thud of each step he hit, I began to panic. He was okay - just scared out of his mind - and as I checked him over he began to calm down and I breathed a sigh of relief that there would be no lasting effects except a fear of that particular doorway. Within a few minutes he was laughing and playing again, totally unphased by what had happened. It wasn’t until a few hours later as I was praising Jesus that he was okay, that those horrible “what if’s” crept into my mind, and then I couldn’t stop crying.

The thing that is sobering in both of these instances is they were complete accidents - I wasn’t in another room not watching him or not paying attention, both times I was siting right there with him and it just happened. And it happened so fast. Today was probably the worst of the two situations and as I sat there sobbing over the what-if’s, I kept thinking that just as fast as it happened, I could’ve lost him just like that. One minute I’m laughing and talking with a friend, the next my child is gone.

As Tim was giving Conner his bath tonight, they were laughing and talking and Conner kept laughing this laugh that only Tim can get him to do. And my eyes welled up with tears at the thought of never getting to hear that laugh again. Life is so short and it’s so precious and it can change in the blink of an eye. It made me thank God so much for protecting Conner, in these instances and even the ones that don’t seem so threatening, and also send up a prayer for any mother who has ever lost a child. Our time on this earth is so limited - enjoy your babies, hug them, kiss them and tell them you love them everyday. You’ll never regret that you did.

I am still hung over from a very fun yet very busy weekend, so I shall fill your day with a video Tim sent me that made me laugh until I about peed. I can totally see the hubby and some of his friends doing this while we were away at our pampering retreat this weekend. Hope your holiday was fun and relaxing!

No onesie how-to, but have no fear, it’s coming. I forget how much energy doing tutorials and how-to’s can be, even as easy as that one. Actually everything these days seems to take so much effort. Just the thought of getting off the sofa seems to get me out of breath. Six weeks to go, that’s all that stands between me and a whole new brand of exhaustion. God bless!

My bloggy pal Amanda co-hosted a baby swap that had the participants send three items: a must-have, a wearable and a keepsake. I breathed a sigh of relief when I got paired with my other bloggy pal (because you never know who or what you’re going to get with swaps and I totally trust Bee’s taste) and began working on her gifts. The must-have came pretty fast to my mind and that was burp cloths. Conner wasn’t a bad spitter-upper, but I have seen my fair share of babes who can’t seem to hold their dairy and the best burp cloths are the ones that are absorbent, like this. Not to mention they’re pleasing to the eye. And the wearable was a stamped onesie for her baby girl to sport.

The keepsake one was tricky because everyone’s taste is so different. Blankets are usually a hit and since I already knew the nursery colors from a previous conversation we’d had, I made Alicia Paulson’s Tiramisu blanket but in more playful colors. You can imagine my delight (and slight jealousy) when Bee told me she was doing her baby girl’s room in teal and red - my dream. Needless to say making that blanket was total eye-candy for me and a pleasure to finish.

I scored some great stuff too: a sweet bib with a porcupine/hedgehog appliqué (I’m such a sucker for appliqué), personalized name tabs to go on Max’s sippy cups (another score - I hate writing on those things), and Butt Paste. I have heard lots of good things about the butt paste, just never used it so hopefully it will treat Max’s derriere right. Thanks so much, Bee!

The nursery bedding has been bought, now the assembly must be completed. This part I loved with Conner however this time around I just keep wondering if I can pay someone to do it for me. Any takers? We’re also doing Conner’s room as well - how smart am I? Eight months pregnant redecorating two bedrooms. And we’re about to move a toddler who has zero sleep issues from his crib that he loves so much into a twin bed - GULP! I am not looking forward to that at all but it must be done. However neither of those things will I fret about this weekend as I am off to a night of rest and relaxation with some mommy friends as we get fed, pampered and showered with attention at our church’s Mom’s Pampering Retreat. I’ve been looking forward to it since last year. Seriously. I leave you with this picture of my little Picasso enjoying his newest favorite past-time, watercolor.

This is a day that I have been waiting for for so long. Most women will tell you they get the whole house and the hubby might get a space of his own (usually the basement), but I don’t see it that way and I finally got to claim a little piece of our house all to myself. I honestly didn’t think it would ever happen, and once it became a reality I quickly became nervous that I wouldn’t do it justice. But I got over that real fast, unpacked and reorganized all my stuff, and it is my pleasure to introduce you to the newest and favoritest corner of my home (as of yet): MY CRAFT SPACE!!

ACK! Is it really mine? I still can’t believe it! See the workstation? That was a birthday/mother’s day gift from the hubby, and it’s actually a kitchen island, fitted with a breakfast bar on the other side so I can sit up high and work. My dad labored hard over that mother to sand, paint and stain it to perfection (as I knew he would - he’s so good with that kind of stuff) and it was all I could do to keep from peeing myself when we picked it up from their house, all finished and pinky-peachy!

The desk is actually the vanity that used to sit in our entryway that was a dark walnut stain. It fits perfectly in between the two china cabinets, so I knew I wouldn’t have to buy another desk, but that dark color wasn’t working at all. So three cans of spray paint later, some new hardware and there ya go - a $15 fix.

These prints my mother in law got me for Christmas and I *heart* them so much (the birds, go figure) and knew that they would be in my future craft space.

Lots of little jars filled with yummy eye-candy and loads of inspiration.

And what I love most about it? It’s on the main floor, just off the kitchen so I can still be in the same vicinity as the fam while I’m working. My favorite part about fixing this space up was rediscovering things I had made and watching Conner discover them for the first time. He loves to come sit in my lap when I’m working on the computer, and each time will point to something new and ask what it is. And I get to tell him it’s something I made, or something someone made for me and in a little way I get to share a little about this part of me that I love so much, and hope one day he will be a part of as well. Besides the fact that I think it’s just the best room ever, it is such a place of peace for my heart that I feel like I finally have a place. I feel so blessed and so lucky. I know that sounds silly, but for those who understand I don’t need to further explain because you totally get it.

I really do walk by this room and sigh with such satisfaction, not so much with what I’ve done with it, but that it’s done. Now it’s time to move onto the boy’s rooms and I hope I get them done soon. The clock is literally ticking away time that I will have to devote to things like this. Next up: a quick tutorial on stamping your own onesies.

Hoping all you mom’s and soon-to-be mom’s have a wonderful and blessed day. And to my own mother, thank you for all you’ve done for me and for only half-joking about giving me away to anyone who would take me during my adolescence. I love you so much!

Thank you all for the birthday wishes, and the owl-softie love. I’m hoping to make more but we will see - time seems to be running out for me as my due date is in eight weeks and then my free time will be reduced dramatically for awhile. I think that’s the biggest thing that freaks me out about having another baby. We’ve got such a good schedule going where I get to enjoy Conner all day, but he plays good on his own and that leaves me lots of time to get stuff done around the house, and also things personally that I want to do. It will be a huge adjustment, but it’s only a short season since they grow up so fast, right? That’s what I will have to tell myself as I’m nursing an infant while simultaneously reading a book to a toddler when what I really want to be doing is cleaning or making something.

We had a fantastic weekend that flew by, however the week is not turning out the same unfortunately. Conner’s getting more teeth and because of that he has been insufferable. He is such a joy to be around most days, so to see him miserable breaks my heart, especially when he climbs into my crowded lap, points to his mouth and says, “Mama, hurrrrrrt”. Our silver lining has been that the weather has been gorgeous so when he really gets to grouching at me, we put his shoes on and head outside where he can play with sticks and follow caterpillars and I can enjoy my happy boy again. This picture was a rare moment amongst all the fits of annoyance and gnashing of teeth.

I feel like I should have something exciting to share, but things around here have been chugging along smoothly, so nothing to share except a quick update and a 32-week belly shot. So much I want to blog about but that will wait a few more days as I finish up some projects and try to keep the little man happy.

I have always had a hard time with birthdays as long as I can remember. It’s not so much the getting older part, but more the disappointment that comes when people forget. Does that sound incredibly sad? I’ve never really experienced great disappointment on my birthday, but there is always that fear I guess. But this year was just another year that I realized that fear was completely silly and I was showered with love and birthday goodness as I celebrated turning 27.

I do have to say I look forward to birthdays since I have some super crafty and thoughtful friends and scored some sweet birthday gifts. But the gift that I am THE MOST excited about is one that Tim got me and that is a workstation for my craft space that is being primed, painted and stained as we speak in my parent’s basement. I can not wait to have it nestled in my craft room and will post pictures as soon as it is done. The day was riddled with flowers and other thoughtful gifts as well, but this year was probably the first year that I really enjoyed my birthday. I do think people get better with age and I guess I’m realizing that I do, too. I have so much to be thankful for, and being able to celebrate being another year older should be cause for celebration and it certainly was.

I still have yet to begin decorating the nursery or really preparing for Max’s arrival, but I did carve out some time to make him a crocheted softie. I saw this pattern here and could not resist it, and although it was my first attempt, I do like the way it turned out.

Conner got so excited about it but then his face dropped when I told him it was for Max. The boy is becoming schizophrenic these days about the baby - one minute he talks about him and is excited and the next he’s closing Max’s bedroom door telling me, “No baby, mama, no baby”. I know it’s a fluid concept still - a baby in mama’s belly - but I think setting up his room will help Conner understand a little more. Or it will further confuse him. Moms of toddlers - how did they react when you brought a new baby home? Did you talk about it a lot before hand? I’m just curious. I think Conner will do fine, but anything I can say or do to soften the blow would help.

Even though baby season is pretty unofficial, if there was a start date for the year 2008 it would begin today. One of my good friends is about ready to pop, with two more followed closely behind. Then it’s my turn, and then about a dozen other’s thrown in as well. I really do count myself so fortunate to be going through such a long and often uncomfortable process with so many that I love, but the hospital staff is going to get so used to seeing all of us as we visit each other and spend a few days recuperating ourselves.

It’s been a little difficult preparing for the gift-aspect of the baby infestation that’s about to happen, esp. since my craft space is not completely unpacked yet. But I did rummage through my supplies quickly enough to whip up a few things. A few of us threw a small shower for Kelly, who is hopefully going to welcome Bennett into the world this week *crossing and double-crossing everything* and I got to show off some new crochet skills.

When I found this pattern I fell in love with them, however like most of my bootie-making experiences, they first came out like boats as apposed to baby shoes. So once I reworked it a little, they turned out great and I can’t wait to make a pair for Max.

I also stamped a onesie since they’re always cute and easy gifts to give. I’ll probably do a quick tutorial on them in a few weeks since I have quite a few more to crank out. I love the colors of this one - boyish and fun.

Last week Tim had a bike-thing he had to go to so for five days it was just me and Conner while daddy flew out to California. I was expecting the week to be long, but I wasn’t expecting to have so much fun with Conner. He certainly got to rule the roost and call the shots - well, as far as having fun and the activities were concerned. Even tho we didn’t do anything special or new, not having Tim there helped us break out of our routine and I feel like we reconnected. And the fact that we will be welcoming another little one soon, it was nice to have a few days with my baby to soak up and enjoy before our world is shaken up a bit.

First of all, you guys rock my face off - thanks for all the comments and suggestions (even you Melany, who didn’t like either choice ;). Good news is like most good wives I was able to wear Tim down and the dots (and myself) have claimed victory *double fist pump*! I’ll definitely “man it up” with trucks or sports balls, or something hyper-masculine so people will know it’s a boys room (Tim suggested I paint a mural of animals attacking one another, blood, carnage and all…classy). I did like Amy’s suggestion to call them balls as apposed to dots - I will definitely be pocketing that suggestion for future debates. We did spend some time Sunday clearing out Max’s room of stuff that needed to make it’s way into the attic so I can begin piecing it together and hopefully have it completed by the time he’s born.

In between traveling and arguing with the hubby, I did manage to squeeze in some time to finish a project for the living room - yet another ripple. I wanted a snuggly blanket that was bright and fun so after agonizing for days, literally, over the colors, I decided to just get started and I love the way it turned out. It really is true that sometimes things turn out the best when you just wing it instead of planning for it. Should I take the same attitude about labor and delivery this time? Maybe…I’ve gotten incredibly lazy this pregnancy.

I had to get some new plants for the house since we didn’t have any and it was beginning to feel stuffy around here. I have no problem admitting that I don’t really like plants, nor do I know anything about them. Well, I do know that you can water a cactus too much (who knew!) and most plants need sunlight. Let’s hope these newcomers survive my “knowledge”.

And one more piece of randomness for your Tuesday morning: A recipe for the BEST GRILLED CHEESE SANDWICH EVER! Tim found this recipe online and now it’s the only grilled cheese we make. It’s so rich and savory, but I don’t think I can capture in words just how good it is. All I know is you need to try it. Today. Ah, bread and cheese…there aren’t too many things that make my heart so happy as these. And don’t be embarrassed if after the first bite you inhale the rest of it because it’s that good.

Greek Grilled Cheese

1 1/2 teaspoons butter, softened
2 slices whole wheat bread, or your favorite bread
2 tablespoons crumbled feta cheese
2 slices Cheddar cheese
1 tablespoon chopped red onion
1/4 tomato, thinly sliced

Butter your bread, heat a skillet over medium heat. Lay buttered side down in skillet, then layer the feta cheese, Cheddar cheese, red onion and tomato. Top with the other slice of bread with the butter side out. Fry the sandwich until golden brown on each side, about 2 minutes per side.